Monday, June 29, 2009

Top 10 Ways to Fire your Boss

Firing the boss is a day many people look forward to when choosing to make money. For some, it marks the journey of a more satisfying career, for others, leaving the corporate world all together. Regardless of the reason why, the normal letter with two weeks notice is out of date and needs updating. Here are some much more creative and fun ways to fire your boss on your wealth journey.

NB. Use at own risk. If you are planning on getting a referral from your boss now or in the future, you may have to modify some of these ideas to ensure you maintain a friendly relationship with the company.

1. Throw a paper aeroplane on to their desk with your desired message on it. Create several paper aeroplanes and do it several times for fun.

2. Fill their office with balloons and leave a pin on their desk with instructions to pop the balloons. You can then have parts of your message all in separate balloons or write the message several times and put the full message in all of the balloons.

3. Leave five or so sticky notes on their computer screen with your desired message. Have some fun hiding more under the desk, on or in the filing cabinet, on papers in their "In" tray, under the keyboard and mouse, on the height adjusting lever on their chair (after you adjust the height).

4. Throw yourself a party with streamers, balloons, the works and have a cake. Share with everyone and have your boss as the guest of honor. Play games like "who knows me best?" and "what's the first thing I should do now that I've quit?" Grin about how you are leaving the whole time.

5. Wrap a present for them. A photo of yourself at some exotic location with your desired message attached. Leave the gift on their desk, making sure their name is on it to ensure they receive it.

6. Set their screen saver to your desired message. Set it so that it goes off after one minute of idle computer time to make sure they see it.

7. Print your message off on a piece of company letterhead paper. Cut it into large puzzle pieces and mail them all at once in individual envelopes to your boss.

8. Create paper chains (cut paper into strips, tape them into paper links and form a chain) out of the words of your message with a note saying there is a big surprise for the person who figures it out first. Give them the biggest piece of your quitting day cake.

9. Jumble up the letters in your words to make a word jumble. Stick it to their computer screen with a note saying that if they figure it out the person in the jumble will give them $5 and see if it motivates them enough to figure it out.

10. Print out your message on fancy paper with love hearts and leave it on their desk in a scented envelope titled "to (their name) from your SECRET ADMIRER".

Good leaving messages:

"I'm sorry but I'm going to have to let you go. I can't handle you as my boss anymore. I'm doing something better with my life. I resign."

"I just can't afford to keep you on anymore. I'm doing better things. I QUIT!"

"I'm sorry, but your position is no longer needed in my life. You have been made redundant. I am following my own desires, not the directions of this company. I quit."

"After reviewing my last six months of performance checks, I've realised that my unique talents and abilities can be utilised much better somewhere else. I quit."

Optional teaser lines to become the second part of the message.

"P.S. The person who broke your chair last year, put chewing gum under your keyboard and wrote (boss' name) stinks on the toilet wall in permanent marker was me."

"P.S. I know who stole your special hand held massaging thingy last month. However if I told you, I'd have to kill you."

"P.S. I've all ready allocated my stationary to (colleague) and my space in the office fridge to (colleague). If you want you can have my wastepaper basket as I know how important office cleanliness is to you"

"P.S. Have a nice day."

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